“We all can go down at the same time,” Emit tells me, earning an exasperated look from Vance.
Hearing this story is better than riding in silence.
“We’d found the love of our collective lives headless on the floor, along with her entire family,” Vance says like he’s ensuring I know this, notably deflecting from what Emit just said. “And the distinct scent Portocale gypsies had in their blood was everywhere,” he adds.
“You keep rushing to the blood and death part,” Emit says in an annoyed tone to Vance.
“It’s the important part and she seems too relaxed about it,” Vance argues, as he darts his gaze back to the window, holds, and restarts his twitching.
“Edmond Portocale had fallen in love with Idun,” Emit goes on, acting like I need more backstory before they get to the meat of this ancient story.
“Of course he did. That woman could make any man fall in love,” Vance states like it’s an obvious factor.
I shouldn’t be jealous of a diabolical, evil monster woman.
“How?” I ask, just as Emit starts to speak again.
“How what?” Emit asks me.
“How could she make any man fall in love? Just curious, since my experience with men leads me down the exact opposite path,” I explain.
Emit cuts a glare to Vance, and Vance bristles, before he looks out the window once again.
“I meant in general and not just the two latest rejections, but thanks for making it weird,” I say to the two of them, watching as they look anywhere but at me. “How did Idun make all these men fall in love?”
“By being the perfect woman,” Vance says like he’s repeating it.
“She went hunting with Vance,” Emit adds. “She was an excellent marksman—had trained herself to be in order to start her ruse with Vance. She was all his favorite things.”
“She was a nature-communing, wilderness-loving adventurer with Emit, even though in truth, she hated nature,” Vance fills me in.
“So basically she lied to all of you, and you fell in love with the version of her that never really existed, and then it got toxic because it was all built on a foundation of bullshit and deception,” I surmise.
Emit scrubs a hand over his jaw, and Vance looks away.
“Simplified down to the barest of roots, yes. I guess you could see it that way. But trust me when I say you still love the person, even if it is all a lie. To say anything else is a cheapened escape hatch one uses to avoid the indignity of the tangled mess that was most certainly Idun Neopry,” Vance says in a quieter tone.
“Then I’m assuming she did more than hunt and go exploring in nature to win you guys over then,” I point out.
Vance says nothing.
“Back then, being everything a man wanted in bed was a sure way to win his heart real damn quickly,” Emit adds, getting more comfortable, like this ride is far from over.
Well, that part sucks to hear. That part is the department I’m clearly lacking in.
“To be fair, you guys were less experienced back then. Surely I’m not that bad. But I certainly lack the experience you’ve all gathered in your non-spring-break years,” I say a little bit defensively.
“Why are we back to spring break?” Emit asks as I dig around in my bag.
“Because the omegas packed me three bikinis and some more questionable clothing. I think I only have one pair of jeans,” I groan.
His lips struggle to restrain a grin, but when I look over at Vance, he’s stopped twitching and looks very tense—like he’s not a happy man right now.
“I explained myself,” the Van Helsing says to me with a cool and distant tone.
“You gave me an excuse. Not really an explanation,” I tell him before returning my attention to Emit. “So Idun made you all fall helplessly in love and do really terrible things on the quest for immortality.”
“She never made us do anything,” Emit answers. “But she could manipulate any situation and any man. Including Edmond Portocale, who was engaged to a nicer, simpler Neopry gypsy.”
“Simpler,” Vance snorts. “She had barely a brain in her head and was a happy-to-be-alive sort of girl,” he goes on like that’s an offensive thing. “Such a gullible, pitiful woman.”
I’m starting to see why we didn’t work. Vance is a total asshole sometimes.
“And Idun was a diabolical mastermind who was so much easier to love,” I interject, smiling coldly at him, which prompts him to turn and glare at me.
“Idun challenged a man. She made him feel like he had something to prove, and made him step up to the next level. I’m not defending her, but I am explaining why the draw was there over some happy-go-lucky, semi-unattractive, hair-brained cousin of hers,” Vance explains.
“Edmond’s forsaken bride didn’t begrudge the new happy couple,” Emit cuts in, sounding a little more uncomfortable. “She cried, I’m sure, but she smiled the next day and brought them a gift to show she loved them both and wished them no ill fortune. Idun laughed in her face, and Edmond looked down on her like she was more pathetic than he’d realized.”
“That’s terrible,” I decide to point out.
“If this is already being found terrible, we should consider this a stopping point,” Vance says pointedly at Emit. “Because it only gets worse from here.”
Emit rolls his eyes as we continue to drive on the long, country road toward the snowcapped mountains in the distance.
It’s weird to see so much grass without heaps of snow covering it. The grass is dead around here, but still, it’s nice to see the ground for a change.
“It’s terrible because it sounds like Idun’s cousin was trying to make it easier on everyone in the family. You said this was a small community you’d built. She was stepping up and making peace, even though she was the wronged party. It’s terrible that you’re calling her hair-brained and mocking her just as they did back then,” I explain, staring at the side of Vance’s face.
He looks back at me, eyes narrowing.
“Remember when I said this was a different time.”
“You just insulted her like five minutes ago. That was now. In this time. She was wise enough to know there could be severe conflict and tried to stop it before there was. Show some respect.”
Emit’s lips twinge with the beginnings of a grin, even though there’s an odd sadness to cloud his eyes.
“What was her name?” I ask when it grows silent.
“Caroline,” they both say.
“You remembered Idun’s name. Just making sure you remember the woman she wronged too.”
“Caroline was just the start of the wronged parties,” Emit goes on.
“The mildest of the mild offenses that was,” Vance adds on a sneer.
“Until later,” Emit says to him, causing Vance to shoot a surprised look toward him.
“Where did that come from? Why would you even bring that up?” Vance asks incredulously. “That part isn’t on us in anyway. There was nothing we could legally do about in-house things.”
“What happened later on?” I ask, leaning forward.
Emit’s eyes meet mine again in the mirror. “Alphas fight, Violet. Caroline was a Neopry alpha. However…she was from the Simpleton stock. She couldn’t shapeshift and walk around in another’s form like the skin walkers of the Neopry family.”
I hate it when they give me a bunch of words that don’t answer my question.
“Originally, gypsy freaks were considered the misfits of a family. A family of gypsy freaks was thought to be of the devil by even our own people,” Vance says like he’s rolling with the new subject. “My family and I were hunters and marksmen. Not gypsy freaks like Emit’s family and Idun’s.”
“Damien’s family too,” Emit inserts, causing Vance to nod.
“Despite their unique threading ability, Portocale gypsies weren’t considered gypsy freaks by everyone,” Vance goes on.
“Van Helsings did a lot of bounty hunting. Always found their bounty too,” Emit elaborates.
“Still do. Eventually. These wolves will be easily found once I get a trail,” Vance adds, though it sounds more like it’s a burden now instead of a point of pride.
“Well, I need the trail of a gas station because my eyeballs are floating.”
Emit takes a turn onto a side road, a grin on his face, as Vance groans.
“You’re one of those,” Vance adds on a tired breath.
“I was hauled out of my house over a shoulder and forced to go on this trip. We’ve been on the road for hours. Most of which was spent in silence. Stop complaining about one trip to the bathroom.”
I swear Vance fights a grin.
They find the oddest things to be amused about.
Or maybe I’m just on the outside of centuries of inside jokes between them, still stuck in the middle of someone else’s story.
“Why is that so amusing?” I ask them.
“Because we’ve been on the road for hours so that I could drive the speed limit and keep you from getting sick in the car,” Emit tells me, which makes me realize this is an inside joke I should get.
I’m not sure why that makes me smile, but I wipe it away quickly, not getting sucked into the sense of belonging that always bites me in the ass with them.
“So Idun Neopry was the first-born, I’m guessing, since that seems to be a theme.”
“Actually, she was just the first-born skin walker to the family. Her brother, Bobo—”
“Bobo? Really?” I interrupt with an incredulous tone while staring at Vance.
“Balder was his real name. He was a giant, but a rather soft fella. His name was later reduced to Bobo because he was considered…the village idiot,” Vance goes on, clearing his throat.
I withhold my judgment for a minute. It’s hard to do.
“Idun could easily manipulate him. First-borns of that time were very important in everyone’s mind. Including Bobo. He had to be the one to make the family offering,” Emit adds.
“Which was?”
“Their red apples,” Emit says, eyes flicking to mine.
He specifically asked if I had any other fruit. I wonder if he also thought I might be Idun.
His eyes hold mine, and he gives a slow shake of the head, like he knows exactly what I’m thinking and is assuring me that wasn’t his intent.
Damn glad my apples aren’t red at this point. All the suspicion is fucking with my head.
“Idun’s family’s red apples were as prized as Portocale oranges,” Vance goes on. “They rotted immediately, never to be grown again,” he adds. “It was their only source of income at that time.”
“The entire family had a lot riding on us finishing up the second sacrifice, but we weren’t told about it until after the altar sacrifice. I went catatonic, so to speak, mourning my wolves and hating myself,” Emit goes on a little quieter.