"Sooooooo, I hear you can't get it up anymore," Astrid commented casually as her grin grew wider.
"Jesus," I muttered as I dropped down on the couch next to her and stretched my sore legs. Jean Paul had gotten a few excellent kicks in. "Good news travels fast."
"Considering it came from the ho-skank Christina, I don't think many will buy it," she said sweetly raised eyebrows and with a shit eating smirk.
"What has gotten into you?" Ethan asked as he seated himself directly across from me.
"Not sure," I replied. I let my head fall into my hands.
"I am," Astrid volunteered. She hopped up, crossed the room with the sleeping Samuel, and tucked him into his big boy bed. His baboon slept contentedly under it on the floor. I was still surprised they’d kept the animal due to the destruction it had caused, but Samuel adored the beast and the feeling was mutual.
"Astrid," I warned as I heard her giggle.
"Out with it," Ethan said tightly, "unless you want my mate to do your dirty work. And trust me, it will sound far worse coming out of her mouth."
"I resent that," Astrid said as she flounced back over and sat on Ethan’s lap.
"I, ahhh…" I didn't know where to start—or if I even wanted to.
We all sat in strained silence and waited to see what I would say. I was more curious than anyone about what might come out of my mouth.
"Well, it's like this…" I began slowly.
"Oh, for shit's sake," Astrid interrupted. "He's in love with Raquel. They've been doing the horizontal hula for longer than I've been alive. I mean, my Uncle God, the entire compound heard them bumping uglies this morning. I'm quite sure she's his mate and he keeps fucking, pun intended, everything up by sleeping with her and not dating her properly."
Ethan was shocked to silence. He had also been correct. The facts were definitely more heinous coming from Astrid's mouth.
I watched Ethan closely, inwardly seething. His eyes were closed and his lips were thin. My gut clenched and my instinct was to attack. What the fuck was wrong with me? He was my prince… and my friend.
I tamped down my fury with difficulty. I’d had enough of being judged and denied. Did he think I wasn't good enough for her too?
"Is this accurate?" he demanded in a choked voice.
I was unsure if his loss of voice was from Astrid's choice of words or if he believed I was unfit to be his sister's mate.
"Not exactly," I mumbled.
"What exactly isn't accurate?" Ethan asked as a small smile pulled at his lips.
"Mine's not ugly," I replied evenly.
Ethan's smile was now full blown.
"And neither is hers."
Oh fuck me. Did I say that out loud? If their large eyes and Ethan's pained wince were any indication… I had.
"Okay, that’s information I could have lived without—forever." Ethan groaned and buried his face in his mate's neck.
"That was a little much," Astrid agreed gleefully.
The statement was amazingly alarming coming from my cousin. Astrid had no filter whatsoever. With my behavior as of late, I supposed I now qualified for the same club.
"Look, it doesn't matter. Raquel doesn't want me. She's made it clear," I stated.
"Have you made you intention clear? Ethan asked.
"Very," I shot back. Under no circumstances would I share my humiliation from two hundred years ago. That was between Raquel and me.
"Do you think it's because you ripped Raquel’s legs off all those years ago?" Astrid asked as she sat forward and clasped her hands together in excitement.
"Possibly… and it wasn't her legs. It was her arm. Only one arm," I added. For a brief moment I contemplated Astrid’s theory and then brushed it aside. "No, how could she be mad about that? She deserved it and it grew back."
Again with the silence.
"She was trying to kill me at the time," I protested. "We're Vampyres. This sort of violence is normal."
"Hmmm… there's a lot you don't know about women," Astrid muttered with an eye roll and an unladylike snort.
"Fine," I relented. "It was a thoughtless move, but I've apologized numerous times over the years for that one."
“Did she ever accept your apology?” she asked.
“No.”
“Then she’s still pissed. I would be fucking furious if someone ripped off my legs,” Astrid declared.
“Arm,” I corrected her.
“Whatever,” she snapped. “I say you offer up your leg, or at least a foot, and let her tear it off. It’s not really normal dating protocol, but we’re Vampyres. I think it might just work.”
“Are you insane?” I hissed.
“Define insane,” she said.
"Enough,” Ethan said. “I believe she's your mate. So does our father.”
My eyes shot to Ethan’s and my chest constricted. Why did all of this have to be so complicated? Mates were supposed to recognize each other. Why couldn't I find someone who wanted me as much as I wanted them?
"Now you just have to convince her," Astrid said logically. “I still think a dismemberment would go a long way.”
“Sweetheart?” Ethan said.
“Yes?”
“I’m quite positive we can come up with a better idea than maiming Heathcliff,” Ethan suggested.