Tam shrugged. “He was our leader, and he wasn’t always like this. We had a really long relationship before he turned so dark I couldn’t ignore it anymore. And if I hadn’t slept with Jack, you and I never would have met. Do you think he would have saved me for last if he and I hadn’t been lovers for so long?”
She was dropping a lot of revelations on Anna, things her friend couldn’t be expected to jump on board with. Especially the Cain thing. Sleeping with him was a betrayal of their friendship after what he’d done to Anna, but it wasn’t like Tam was doing it because she was into him. But explaining that would only make the situation worse.
“You can’t sleep with Cain. He’s dangerous. He’s not like Luc. Do you have him under a spell or something?”
“No, of course not.”
“Maybe you should. For your own safety.”
Tam didn’t have the heart to tell her how badly such a spell would backfire and move her further from her goal.
“Considering how using magic ended for you, I can’t believe you’d say that. You want me to end up mated to him?”
Anna made a face. “Of course not. He hasn’t even put a mark of protection on you. If he’s supposed to be protecting you, why hasn’t he done that?”
“It wouldn’t work against Jack, and the demons are afraid to defy him. Nobody thinks killing me is worth an indeterminate amount of time locked in the caves. Trust me. It’s hard to hate somebody that much.”
Anna didn’t seem to know about the caves, if the look of confusion on her face was any indication. Luc probably hadn’t thought to mention them yet.
“I don’t know why you’re sleeping with him, and I don’t even want to think about it. It’s icky. But you have to stop. He’ll kill you.”
Tam snorted. “Not at the rate he’s going, he won’t.”
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“Nothing. Just forget it.”
Anna’s eyes widened. “You want him to kill you. Why? We’ll find Jack. You’re safe here. You don’t have to sacrifice yourself. God, Tam. Nobody likes a martyr.”
Tam dropped onto the couch, feeling suddenly drained. “Try to imagine dying—but not really dying—and being a kid again. Try to imagine having your mental and emotional sexual development all set, but having to be celibate for several years until you can find someone to scratch your itches again—until you look like an adult again. Try to imagine having to move every time it happens, or if your friends start aging but you aren’t aging fast enough. Sure, I’ve had witch friends, but I’ve had to keep them all at arm’s length to keep my secret, and eventually I have to leave them as well because even they would figure out something about me was different. You were the first regular person I’d let into my life for a long time. And it was only because I knew Henry was getting older and I’d be alone again.”
“But, it’s not like that now,” Anna said. “You’ve got immortal friends. You don’t have to keep losing everybody... and I mean, sure the celibacy thing is a little annoying, but...”
“You’re not listening to me. I’m tired of this. I don’t want to live this way any longer. It’s unnatural. It makes me feel out of sync with everyone and everything. With the other cyclers mostly gone, I’m a freak. I don’t want to be a freak anymore, Anna. I want to have a tribe of others like me, however I might be. Can’t you understand that? I’ll reincarnate. I’m sure I’ll keep some memories. We’ll find each other.” She wasn’t about to mention the other dimension thing.
“I need some air. I’ll get Luc to come by and grab your clothes. We’ll take them to your house and wash them for you.”
“Thanks,” Tam said, but the word came out forced. A couple of years ago, Anna wouldn’t have given up on her so easily. Things were so different between them it made her heart hurt. Anna was with Luc and a part of this new demon world now, not Tam’s anymore. She was really alone now.
***
Cain tromped through the streets of Cary Town. It had taken a lot of threatening to get one of Anthony’s guardians to tell him where Dayne Wickham’s cottage was. He’d never gone to a magic user for anything, he didn’t trust them, but it was beginning to feel more dangerous to sleep with Tam without giving into her death wish.
Even with her books locked away, she could still create a chant to curse him. Hell, she may already have. He thought about her far too much. He’d been sure she’d be out of his system in a week—like the flu. By that time, he’d come to his senses and not try to hold on. Just because she was two thousand and understood what it was to be in the same form for so long didn’t mean he’d make her his mate. He’d never take a mate.
Was he keeping her on reserve for if he became bored enough to settle down in another thousand years? Wasn’t he the one who’d ensured all books referencing demon mating in his dimension had been destroyed? Hadn’t he discouraged his demons from enslaving themselves like that? Caring about anybody but yourself was a curse. It made you weak, vulnerable. It made you do stupid things to destroy your life.
He’d tried to kill Anna to save Luc from such a fate, but she’d gone through with the mating ritual at the last minute because she couldn’t bear to be separated from him. Now Cain had to watch them make googly eyes at each other all the time, both of them looking so happy and at peace with the world. Surely that would wear off at some point, and then they’d be miserable but tied to each other for eternity.
The demon growled. He wasn’t about to let some wisp of a girl come along and seduce him away from his freedom like that. Certainly not a witch. They were too dangerous, which was why he had to be smarter. He should have sought magical protection after the first time he’d spared her. If her death wish was this strong, she’d use magic to control him if she got angry enough. He knew how that went.
There was no way for an incubus to protect himself wholesale against all magic or magic users. The man upstairs had made sure of that, wanting to limit and restrict demon powers. But with a personal object from a specific witch, he could gain temporary protection with the help of a strong magic user. It would be enough to buy him some time.
Dayne fit that bill, and Cain had a pair of Tam’s panties in his pocket to seal the spell. She’d left them in the caves. What else was he going to unobtrusively take without her notice? They were ripped, anyway. It wasn’t as if she’d miss them.
On his way to the forest, he caught a pretty blonde’s eye. She smiled at him, then blushed and turned away. Yes, he’d just fed from Tam, but not fully. He was pulling his punches now that he couldn’t decide if he wanted to kill her. He didn’t want to kill the witch by accident until he was sure.
He strode across the street to the woman, demon swagger fully engaged. “Hello.”
The sunlight glistened off her hair. She looked a bit like Tam, except her hair was longer. Goddamnit. Stop that! Stop comparing her. If he couldn’t stop thinking about the bane of his existence when he was about to catch another meal, he was truly lost. Tam wasn’t his. She wasn’t going to be his. He didn’t know what the hell she was, but the only way out was to sleep with as many women as possible until he could do it without distraction, until he could enjoy being a demon again. This interest he’d taken in the witch was unnatural.
The woman gave him another of those shy smiles, unaware of the conflicted emotions going through his head. “Hi.”
“Let’s go to your place,” Cain said without preamble. Why mince words? He took her hand and looked deeply into her eyes, projecting thoughts and feelings that would make a whore blush.
Her face flushed a deep red, and she appeared as if she might faint. Cain hadn’t encountered many fainters since corsets went out of fashion. He used to believe it was the intense power of his charms, until he realized they couldn’t breathe properly in those whalebone cages. It didn’t take much to quite literally take their breath away. He missed those days. He’d found the corseted look sexy.
He reached out for her. “Steady, there. My name is Cain,” he said, knowing the effect the rumble of his voice had on her.
“Gloria. It m-must be low blood sugar,” she said, clearly not wanting him to suspect the thoughts running through her mind. She’d never guess he’d put them there.
“That must be it,” he replied. “Why don’t we go to your house, and I’ll make you something to eat?” He gave her a sly look that let her know there might be something on the menu more than food.
This was always the fun part, finding out how much a woman was controlled by her baser desires. Popular myth insisted it was the men who wanted sex all the time and the women could take it or leave it. Cain’s experience showed this idea to be unfounded by a wide margin. On rare occasion, a woman could have the full force of his thrall working against her and still manage to push through that fog to say no, no matter what she wanted or how desperately he’d made her want it. And that was her free-will right. As a demon, he couldn’t feed without some form of capitulation.
“I-I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.” She looked around for someone to save her, but this particular street was clear of other Cary Town residents.
He arched a brow. “Such willpower you have. I bet you never indulge in chocolate, either.” He sent her an image of herself licking chocolate off him. He gripped her elbow to keep her steady on her feet when she swayed again.
“I h-have somewhere I need to be,” she said.
Where she needed to be was in her bed underneath him. This was getting tiresome. The demon pulled her to him and kissed her. She moaned against his lips, her body melting into him, giving in. He chuckled and pulled away.
“Now, where do you need to go?”
“M-my house,” she said.
He nodded his approval. “With whom?”