Okay, he looked pissed. But what did he expect when he said shit like that?
“Danni, just do what I tell you to.”
Oh, wrong thing to say, buddy. I didn’t give a flying crap if he was pissed or not, I was not being ordered around like a kid.
“Why do you have to be such a dick when you open your mouth?”
He sighed. “Little one, this is—”
“And stop calling me that.” I loved the endearment, which right now made me hate it.
“I was there.”
My heart skipped a beat. “Yeah, heard that already.”
I tried to act flippant, but with the bright lights from the street illuminating his face, I saw the truth in his expression. Shit, this was what I wanted, and yet it terrified me.
“I saw what that bastard did to you and I can’t get it out of my head.” He let go of my arms, leaned forward and caged me in by placing his palms against the door. “Every fuckin’ time I close my eyes, I hear your screams and it fuckin’ rips me apart. I stayed away, but . . . I just couldn’t do it any longer.”
I stood frozen, staring.
He grabbed my shoulders. “Are you listening to me? I’d sell my fuckin’ soul to the devil to take back what happened to you. Fuck, I did.” He moved closer so his chest pressed against mine. I swallowed as my nipples reacted and hardened. “I can’t let anyone hurt you again. I won’t. I need you safe and that means you have to listen to me. Promise me you’ll be more careful.”
The pull I had toward him was overwhelming. I was the negative side of the magnet and he was the positive, dragging me closer. My senses needed to touch, taste, and smell him. God, why? Why was this happening? All I wanted was peace from my past, and still it gripped me like a fish hook. I couldn’t explain the pull toward him. It didn’t make sense.
“Why were you there? Were you his accomplice?” As soon as the words left my mouth, I knew he wasn’t; he’d even said we’d both been in a cage. He’d suffered like I had. No, somehow I knew he’d suffered worse.
He cursed under his breath. “Fuck, no. I’d never hurt you.” He growled low in his throat and ran his hand through his hair. “I feel you all the fuckin’ time, Danni. I can’t get you out of me. But what I feel for you will destroy us both.”
Oh, God, why did he have to go and say shit like that?
“What’s between us . . . it’s not natural, but I need you so bad I feel as if my insides will dissolve into a thousand particles if I can’t have you. It’s not fuckin’ normal. I don’t know what it is, but I can’t stop it.”
I didn’t tell him that I felt it, too. Shit, I wanted him so much it hurt and that was crazy. Maybe, we were both insane.
His fingers curled around the back of my neck; then he tugged. I stumbled into his arms and he lowered his head until our lips were inches apart; his warm breath drifting over my skin. I never wanted to taste anything as badly as I did him.
“Balen.” I felt like I knew every inch of him, every pain and happiness. It was an irresistible draw toward him that I couldn’t explain, and right now, I didn’t want to.
“Jesus, Danni. What am I doing?” He abruptly pulled away. “I have to get out of here.”
“But . . .”
Balen’s eyes looked tormented, the green darkening and his brows lowering over them. “If you . . . Danni, follow your instinct. If something doesn’t feel right, go to your friends. They’ll protect you.”
I didn’t even contemplate his words; all I could think about was him leaving me again. “Are you coming back?”
His jaw clenched. “No. I can’t ever come back.”
It felt as if a lead weight dropped into my stomach. “No.” Shit. What the hell was I doing? But the words tumbled from my mouth and I couldn’t stop them. Truthfully, I didn’t want to. “Don’t leave.”
“Danni—”
I curled my fingers around the edges of his coat. “Stay.” Shit, five minutes ago I was ready to belt him one. Now, I wanted him to stay. I was all screwed up, not understanding what was happening, why I was so connected to him.
He stepped back. “No.”
“I need you to stay.”
His hands curled into fists at his sides. “No. Go inside.” He went to turn, but I held onto his coat.
“One night.” Whatever pull was between us, whatever past we shared, it had led to this moment and I wasn’t letting it go.
I’D BEEN READY TO walk away. I’d been prepared to leave her.
I wanted to punch something. Destroy. I was never fuckin’ coming back. There’d never be anything between us.
“You don’t know what the fuck you’re saying, Danni.” But all I thought about was holding her in my arms. Feeling her legs curl around me as I slipped my cock into her tight warmth. For years, as I fought the blood lust, I imagined fucking her, feeling her fingernails in my back, hearing her scream my name instead of the one I heard in my dreams.
“Don’t patronize me. I know exactly what I’m saying.”
I closed my eyes, willing myself to walk away, yet unable to.
“I want this. I need this. Don’t you dare walk away—again. You’re the first guy I’ve wanted to touch me since . . . whatever happened to us. I’m not asking for anything more than one night. I know you’re running from something¸ and I don’t do relationships, so it works. I just want—”