No one said anything.
I knew this had been coming. It was inevitable. However, suddenly, it all just seemed wrong.
For two days, I lay in bed unable to eat. Any noise made my heart rate spike, thinking it was Waleron with news of Balen. But the Taldeburu had disappeared just like Balen and Delara.
There was still no word as to Balen’s fate.
Anstice brought me food every day, which I left untouched. The thought of eating made my stomach churn and water was the only thing I could keep down. I even wondered if the Bonding spell was still in play because it sure felt like I was dying. In reality, I knew there was no physical sickness, just emotions beating my body like a punching bag.
Hack looked in on me briefly—like he had to see for himself that I still lived and breathed—although he never said anything.
Jedrik came and sat with me while I dozed on and off. He rambled and urged me to get out of bed, using jokes and music to try and lift my spirits. But I just wanted to sleep.
Last night, I heard a furious, tormented cry and then footsteps running down the hallway. Anstice told me this morning it was Ryker. The bomb inside him had finally detonated. They tried to reach Waleron to put Ryker in a deep sleep, but he was AWOL. Supposedly, Keir, Hack, and Jedrik had to use force to get Ryker contained in a room down in the sub-basement . . . whatever that meant.
An abrupt knock sounded. I tightened the covers around me and rolled over. The door swung open.
“Get the fuck up.”
Kilter.
He walked across the room and yanked the drapes open. The afternoon sun spilled in and I pulled the covers over my head. Damn it, why wouldn’t they leave me alone?
“Get the fuck up and stop being so selfish.” Kilter jerked the blankets off the bed, and I squealed, diving for them. He marched over to the window, opened it, and tossed them outside.
He didn’t stop there. Kilter stormed into the bathroom and I heard the shower turn on. When he came out and headed straight for me, I panicked and scrambled to the opposite side of the bed.
He stopped and crossed his arms. “We have work to do. Get showered, pull your shit together, and meet me in the study in ten minutes.” He glanced at his watch. “Make that nine. You just wasted one minute.”
“Get out! Who the hell do you think you are? I can lie in bed for the rest of my life if I feel like it. I hate you. And if Balen were here, he’d kick your ass.”
Kilter’s brows rose. “But he’s not, is he? He’s gone and he’s probably never coming back.” I threw my pillow at his head and he caught it, tossed it aside, and approached the bed. “Deal with it. This crap you’re pulling is over. Your training will begin ASAP.”
“I’ve thought about it and decided I don’t want to. I’ll go home in a few days and get back to my gallery. Better yet, I’ll just go home now.” I grabbed my bathrobe from the floor and pulled it on. “Piss off, Kilter.”
I screamed as he grabbed me around the waist and threw me over his shoulder. I kicked and shouted and punched him in the back several times before he managed to get me into the bathroom. Without hesitating, he dumped me under the warm spray of the water.
“Balen would be disappointed in you,” Kilter said. “He respected you and was proud of the chick you were.” He pulled the soaking wet bathrobe from my shoulders and threw it into the sink. “You’re a Scar now. And you will train. You’ll fuckin’ learn to harness your abilities. And you’ll start in,” he glanced at his watch, “seven minutes.”
I stood under the spray; pajamas soaked, hair dripping wet, and my body ready to crumble into a million pieces. “I don’t know how,” I mumbled under my breath. My body shivered despite the heat of the water.
I closed my eyes and tears mixed with the water. At least, Kilter wouldn’t know I was crying. I really couldn’t put up with one more crass remark from him.
“Fight,” Kilter said. “You’re a fighter, yet for some reason you aren’t fighting for this guy you love.” He reached over and passed me the shampoo. I took it. “Fight for what you want.” He shrugged. “Who knows, maybe you can appeal the Deaconry’s decision. Did you even think of that? Or were you too busy feeling sorry for yourself?” He stepped back, yanked the shower curtain closed, and strode out of the bathroom. I heard him yell, “Six minutes,” before my bedroom door slammed.
I STIFFENED WHEN I heard the soft voice behind me. I slowly turned and saw her pale white skin flush when I met her eyes. She shifted her feet, her blue silk gown swaying with the slightest movement.
“What the fuck do you want?”
“For you to understand,” Genevieve said.
“So I can forgive you?” I laughed. “Forgiveness will never pass these lips. Live with it. Now get the hell away from me.”
She ignored me, brave bitch. “You gave everything for her. Your oath. Your pride. Your heart. Your life as you knew it. Why?”
I remained silent, pacing the marble cell back and forth, the gold bands rubbing my wrists as I moved.
“I felt it, you know,” Genevieve said. “The connection, the pain, the horror in your veins when Ryszard hurt—”
“Don’t you fuckin’ dare talk about that shit.”
Genevieve lowered her head. “You love her. A love so great I can feel it within every inch of me. It haunted me for two years, feeling your grief, feeling you fighting the evil inside that tried to claim you. But it didn’t win. And you know why? Why everyone else has failed and why you did not? Because you knew that one day, if you destroyed the tainted blood, one day you’d be able to come back and see her again.”