I gulped deeply at the pain in his eyes. It cost him a lot to allow me to do this. He wasn’t lying.
One thing about Kellen was that his word was honorable. He never wavered away from it, and right now, I wanted nothing more than to be locked in his arms forever.
Here was where my heart belonged.
I kissed his lips once more deeply just so I could confirm to him that I knew my place—to show him my sorrow for the pain I’d caused him. Then, I slowly backed away and needed to remind him I was here to do a job.
“We have to get back.” My team would be waiting to get into the case and they’d be annoyed that we were taking our sweet-ass time. Even more than that, I could only imagine what Chase was thinking.
Chase.
I sighed and willed the tears to stay away. What a jumbled emotional mess I was in.
A state I’d never been in and one I could live without.
Kellen laughed as he placed me on my seat. “Yes, we have a serial killer to have a little chat with.”
I reached down, grabbed my bra and clipped it into place. As I reached for my shirt, I gave him a speculative glance. “You find that funny?”
Kellen nodded without hesitation. “Quite. You have the ability to kill a human, but instead, you’re saving their lives.” He winked. “It’s amusing.”
Finishing up with the last button on my shirt, I snorted. “Feels a hell of a lot better to save someone than see them destroyed.” It was hard to believe how much vampires had evolved.
Two hundred years ago, they killed for the pleasure of it. Now, they lived peacefully among the mortals. Considering the act of feeding on them gave the mortal enhanced pleasure during sex, they came willingly. Times had changed and I was glad for it. The killing never did sit right with me, even if I was a natural born killer.
I picked up my jacket and swore softly. I never went without my coat on the job and the implication would be obvious. Chase would know what happened. Not that I’d keep the truth from him, he’d been lied to enough. If he asked me outright, I’d tell him what happened here. I threw the shreds that were once my jacket into the backseat and grabbed my pants from the floor of the car. Lifting my hips, I pulled them on and zipped them up.
“So tell me, what you have been doing over the years?”
“Watching you.”
My hands steadied on the button as I turned my speculative glare on Kellen.
“Watching me?”
“I have stayed with you the entire time,” he answered, completely unashamed. “You think I would have left you alone?”
Why I suspected otherwise was just stupid on my part. Instead of voice that, I moved along. “So you have been living in Washington then?”
Kellen nodded, then started the car. “I have been working for Slade.” When he saw my next question rise on my face, he continued. “A shield.”
It took a moment to process what he had just said. Maybe because I couldn’t believe it. “You’ve joined the Mistresses?”
In vampire society, Mistresses’ vampires had many who worked beneath them. It was far more serious than what I did with the mortal governments and it wasn’t a job that appealed to me in any regard. You did a bad job or f**ked up—you died.
Kellen had finished buttoning up his shirt, then started the car and began to drive out from around the rundown garage. “Mistress Ellery was pleased to have me join her guard.”
This should not surprise me to hear, but it did. Kellen had once held a role within the Mistresses’
guard and hunted those who defied their laws. But he had moved on, tired of the death. Why would he return? None of this made any sense. “And you are happy doing that?”
He laughed loudly, clearly at my surprise. “Once a shield, always a shield.” He gave a firm nod of his head. “It feels good to be back to what I’m good at and I needed to keep myself busy in the time you were gone.”
After a moment’s thought, I suddenly realized just how great this was. If Kellen had joined Mistress Ellery’s guard that meant he had taken an oath to her. It also meant we wouldn’t leave any time soon. He wasn’t going to make me leave my job. I could continue doing what I loved and that made me blissfully happy. Feeling all warm and fuzzy, I felt the need to reciprocate that feeling. “You were always the best you know.”
He was highly respected within vampire society. His warrior skills were impeccable and I had always been proud of that.
Kellen grinned with superiority as he made a turn back on the main road. “Still am.”
A classic Kellen answer. “I see the arrogance about you hasn’t changed.”
“You know you’ve missed it.” He winked playfully.
I could only smile in return. I had missed him but until now hadn’t realized just how much. Being beside him, having his hand rest on my thigh, was right in every way.
But I also knew I needed the time to accept this. Accept that I needed him—couldn’t be without him. He’d been right in what he’d said to me the night I left him.
“We are soul bound, take this time, but you will return to my side and be happy to be there.”
Kellen made my life worth living. I might pretend to have moved on, and not need him, but it was all an illusion. We belonged together. However, realizing all this left an empty space in my heart.
Where did Chase fit into this? I needed—wanted to keep him forever.
Only one question remained…did he want to keep me?
Chapter Four
Twenty minutes later, we were back at the station and had just entered the room viewing the interrogation of Chad McKinney. Chase stood with his arms crossed. Oh yes, the glare on his face said he knew exactly what had taken place between Kellen and me.
Guilt roared through me and left me confused. One part of me was utterly thrilled to reunite with Kellen, while the other was horrified at what I’d done.
Not only had I cheated sexually, but emotionally as well. However, the truth of the matter was, he either had to accept that Kellen was back in my life or our relationship would be over.
My heart told me this relationship was heading toward the garbage disposal. The thought of not being held by Chase, not see his smile or feel his love, crippled me.
Kellen stepped up next to me, his sigh heavy before he closed the door with a loud slam then locked it. The move forced Mike and Nick to look his way. The second they did, he said, “Go to sleep now.”
A second later, both men fell to the floor, dead to the world. It was just the thing to snap me out of my sadness. I shot my gaze back to Kellen. “What the hell did you do that for?”
Kellen nodded outward with a knowing look. “We must deal with this. I’m not going to stand by to see you in this much pain. Sort it out now.”
Knowing exactly what he meant, I looked back to the person I needed to sort things out with.
When I met his gaze, I’d never seen him so angry. His entire body was tense and the veins in his arms looked a moment away from bursting.
Chase seemed shocked, or traumatized, one of the two. He finally snapped out of wherever he had gone and glared at Kellen. “You f**king killed them?”
Kellen shook his head as he looked down at the men on the floor. “No, they are sleeping,” he waved out, “have a look for yourself.”
Chase rushed over to Mike, flipped him over and placed his fingers on his neck to check for a pulse. A moment later, he stood. The rage still burned in his eyes, but at least he looked a little more controlled now.
I understood why Kellen had done it. Yes, Chase and I had to talk, and I was actually glad it’d been forced upon me. I doubted I would’ve known what to do otherwise. But I never mind-warped my team, ever!
My glare was quick and steadied on Kellen. “I do not use mind control unless I have to, Kellen.
Do not ever do that again, do you understand me?”
Kellen’s brows furrowed, clearly displeased with me. “You have denied your abilities too long, Hadley.” He shook his head in a disgusted manner. “What a waste.”
I’d stood up to this man many times before and his angry face still did nothing except piss me off more. “Promise me you won’t do that again.”
Kellen studied me intently. Irritation ran through those dark eyes of his. The annoyance said that he realized just how mortal I’d become. Maybe it was the first time he grasped how much I had changed. I could tell by the unhappiness on his face, he didn’t approve of the woman I’d become in this regard. I never doubted he would. He was a vampire, loved it and lived it. Conforming to mortal rules was definitely beneath him, but this wasn’t his life, it was mine.
That determination must have showed on my face because he eventually sighed and inclined his head in acknowledgement.
Resolved, I glanced back at Chase who stood, the glare on his face even worse now.
Just as I knew Kellen, I knew Chase equally so. He was loyal, honest, everything that were qualities of a person good. I doubted he’d forgive me from keeping such secrets from him, but it didn’t mean I wasn’t going to try. If I was going to lose him, which I suspected, I needed to do it with a clear conscience. I needed to know that at least I tried to explain my actions.