I sucked in a deep breath before I steadied myself. “Chase…”
Chase raised a hand to stop me and my mouth shut promptly. “Do not say a f**king word to me.” Fury radiated in his tone and his voice dropped a whole octave.
Okay, so I expected this reaction. But it didn’t mean this wasn’t painful to watch.
Chase was a closed off type of guy. So serious, he only let a few people into his personal space. I had now become one of the people he kept out. Pain coursed through my heart.
“Please just listen to what I have to say,” I pleaded, desperate for him to hear me out.
“I just want to explain myself.”
Chase took a deep breath through his nose. His jaw clenched tightly. “You don’t deserve to be heard.”
Kellen snorted. “Say that again, bloke, and I’ll stuff that pretty head of yours up your arse.”
Chase’s body vibrated with anger.
I stepped in between them, not wanting a fight to break out. This wasn’t about them fighting, but about making my peace. My bottom lip quivered, but I forced myself to stay strong. I would not fall to pieces here. I was in the wrong and deserved his wrath. I owed him that.
“Okay, I deserve that.” I acknowledged his feelings in hopes that it would calm him.
“You have a right to hate me.”
“Damn right I do.” Chase tore his gaze from Kellen and focused on me. “You’re f**king married and never said a word about it.” He raised his hand and pointed at Kellen. “This bugger comes in, kisses you and you go all mushy in his arms. Then, you return with him and reek of sex. I see the blush of your cheeks that only comes after you’ve f**ked. So, tell me, Hadley.” His voice was so cold. “Why should I listen to one word that comes out of your mouth?”
I glanced at Kellen who simply looked annoyed by the conversation. He wouldn’t ever understand. He’d just mind-warp Chase and leave it at that. That wasn’t an option for me. My relationship with Chase was real. I wanted it to stay that way.
I looked back at Chase, pleading. “I’m not going to deny that Kellen and I have been together and I won’t lie that he has returned to be with me again.” Chase’s eyes burned with such rage, it was a surprise his head hadn’t blown off. Quickly, I added, “But it’s not what you’re thinking, I’m not breaking up with you for him. You just don’t understand vampires.”
Chase gave a firm nod. “Yeah, ’cause I am f**king not one of you.”
“I know that,” I whispered. “But that’s what I’m trying to explain to you. We’re not monogamous.”
Chase snorted a laugh that was in no way a happy sound. “That’s clear, isn’t it?
Since the vamp isn’t at all put off that you’ve been f**king someone else while married to him.”
The term he’d just used broke my heart. “We haven’t just been f**king…we’re in love…”
Chase’s gaze would kill me if able to and the look forced me not to continue. “Do not even f**king go there, Hadley.”
My mouth clamped shut. I didn’t know what to do. To me, it was normal to be married and have a mortal lover. Of course, it was almost unheard of for a vampire to be in love with one. Consorts were treated with great respect and thought highly of. But to be loved? It just never happened. Truthfully, I hadn’t been looking for love, nor expecting it. Just like the fairytales say, Chase just rode into my life and swept me off my feet.
I glanced to Kellen, feeling lost and confused. What was I to say? I’m sorry. I wouldn’t dare say something like that. I would never say I was sorry I hurt him. He deserved so much more than that. What I wanted was for him to accept this and forgive me on his own accord.
Kellen gave me a reassuring smile. Then, his gaze fell on Chase. “The name is Kellen.” He extended his hand.
Chase crossed his arms over his chest, his eyes blazed with hatred. “I don’t f**king care who you are.”
Kellen lowered his hand and laughed. “You do love her, no?”
The point-blank question snapped Chase away from his anger for a moment and the barrier of protection he’d created around himself fell. Sadness washed across his face and he gulped deeply. He glanced at me with soft eyes and the gentleness in them spread goose bumps along my skin. This was the man I loved standing right here in front of me, vulnerable.
It only lasted a moment before his gaze returned to hard steel. He focused back on Kellen. “And what if I do?”
“Then, best we introduce ourselves.” Kellen extended his hand again. “If you want to be in her life, you will be in mine also. Our being friends will make this better for her.”
Chase dropped his arms, clearly stunned. “Say that again? You want me in her life?”
Kellen nodded without hesitation, lowered his hand again, looking annoyed and nodded toward me. “If you’d get over yourself and stop being so angry for a moment, you’d realize that is what she is trying to tell you. Nothing has changed between the two of you. Her love for you remains. Therefore, if she wants you in her life, the choice is not mine to make.”
Chase gave him a speculative glare, plainly disbelieving him. He stood quiet a moment clearly trying to process this all. Finally, he found his voice. “As in, you are willing to share her with another man?”
Kellen gave his head a slow frustrated shake. “Mortals.” He sighed then continued.
“The way about you all is amusing. Of course, I am willing to share her. Why would I refuse her someone who makes her happy?”
I stepped forward then placed my hand on Chase’s arm, pleased that he didn’t tense beneath my touch or flinch away. “Kellen is a vampire,” I told him softly.
Chase looked back at him, gave him a once over. “Point being?”
“We are wed under vampire law. Yes, we love each other and yes, he is back to stay, but I want you in my life too.”
Chase’s brows furrowed as his gaze searched mine. “He may be okay with sharing you, but I’m not sure I’m capable of such a thing.”
I sighed and prayed this wasn’t the end. I hoped I wouldn’t have to erase our time together from his mind. Those were the rules if a mortal knew about a vampire and if things got messy. Their mind would have to be wiped clean—no scorned mortals to run around telling secrets. It created a safety net for vampires. Those were the laws the Vampire Mistresses lived by and every one followed or else they suffered some serious consequences. And I had no interest in being punished by a Mistress. I enjoyed my life too much to screw it up.
“It’s the only way to be together,” I implored he understand all this. “Kellen and I are bound. He gave me time to myself these past years—oh, bunch of years—so I could make something of myself, but…” I glanced up at Kellen to see a superior grin planted on his face, “I realize how wrong it was of me to keep him away.” Then, I looked back at Chase. “I love you, Chase. I want you to stay in my life too.”
Chase huffed, glanced down to his feet where he shuffled them around, apparently mulling this over.
Silence filled the room for well over ten minutes, while Chase looked at the ground.
Kellen seemed uninterested in the present happenings and more fascinated in the interrogation taking place on the other side of the two-way mirror.
Chase finally sighed and raised his gaze to mine. “Let me get this straight.” He pointed between Kellen and me. “You are married under vampire law.”
“That’s right.” I was glad his mind was working again and he was putting things together. That had to be a good sign, right?
Chase glanced at Kellen and continued, “You are back in her life as her husband. But you don’t mind that she continues to have a relationship with me?”
Kellen nodded and looked bored. “That is what was said, yes.”
Chase gave his head a shake then looked directly at me. “Even though he is back in your life, you still want to have a relationship with me?”
“Of course I do.” Tears were on the brink of forming. I restrained them as bloody tears would likely upset him and I’d done enough of that already.
Chase crossed his arms over his chest which lowered my hand from his forearm, and gave me an expression I’d seen before. He was deep in thought. He worried his bottom lip in his mouth. After a final bite of his bottom lip he said, “This is by far the most f**ked up thing I have ever heard, you do realize this?”
“It’s the only way you will have her, chum,” Kellen responded. His expression turned to one of a challenge. “Do you love her enough to share her?”
It seemed like a valid question, but I knew Kellen. He was challenging and testing Chase’s character. If Kellen didn’t believe he would be loyal to me, that he deserved these feelings I had for him, he would have wiped his memories in a flash regardless of how I felt on the matter.
That was Kellen. Always acting on what he thought best for me, which was one of the reasons I left when I had. I liked making my own decisions. I sent a little warning glare Kellen’s way. The determined set of his eyes faded immediately and he sank back against the wall.