“Red rover, red rover. Red rover, red rover. Red rover, red rover.”
“I know,” I said, trying to soothe her. I had the crazy urge to pull her to me and stroke her hair. To just hold her tight. But I knew she’d hate all that touching. I needed it more than she did.
“Is she okay?” Carter asked. “She seems a little out of it.”
“She’ll be fine. I gave her a Valium before we left the room. I didn’t want her to freak out.”
He raised his eyebrows, looking impressed.
I didn’t wait for him to comment, but asked, “What’s going on? Where did you get—”
“Come on,” Carter urged. “Let’s get out of here before even more Collabs show up.”
He grabbed my elbow and started walking, leading me—and Mel along with me—back toward the shadows of the gymnasium. I automatically fell into step beside him, staggering to keep up with his brisk pace. But it felt good to move. Adrenaline was pumping through my veins and it was either move or curl into a trembling fetal ball.
“What’s going on? Have you become a Collab? Is that where you were all evening?” The stream of questions came pouring out. “When you disappeared at fourth meal and then didn’t show up back at the science building, I was sure you’d been taken to the Dean’s office.”
Carter turned to face me, giving his head a little shake to flip his long bangs out of his eyes. Standing out on the open lawn, in the light of the nearly full moon, I could see him almost as clearly as if we were back in the fluorescent lights of the science lab. He’d followed my advice and shaven, so that those long scraggly bangs were the only remnant of the Carter I thought I knew.
“You and Mel are out after curfew. We gotta get you back to safety before someone with a few more brains than that Collab comes along and asks questions.”
I glanced around. Damn it, he was right. Anyone could see us here. We couldn’t just stand around. All we had going for us was that everyone avoided this side of campus because of the stench from garbage in the stadium.
Still, every step we took away from the hole in the fence was a step away from freedom. I could have told Carter about the escape plan. Hell, an hour ago, I’d desperately wanted him to show up so I could tell him. But everything was different now. It wasn’t just the outfit, either. Or the fact that the other Collab had known him and deferred to him. It was something about the way he held himself. Like he was used to wearing the outfit. Like it fit him.
Now I didn’t dare tell him anything. Not until I knew what he was up to. Until I knew if the supposed badass Sebastian had brought him here as a Green or as a Collab. So I let him lead us away from our one escape route. Until I knew if I could trust him, I didn’t want him anywhere near it.
I comforted myself with one thought. Even if Carter had run off and joined the Collabs in the past couple of hours, I still didn’t think he was going to turn us in. Not really. Not after he’d just saved us from Scruffy. And hugged me—whatever that had been about.
Worst-case scenario, he’d walk us back to the science building, we’d pretend to hunker down for the night, and Mel and I would try again in a few hours. Yeah, it wasn’t plan A, but it was a hell of a lot better than the plan where I had to stab a Collab with gardening shears.
Still, I couldn’t help myself from asking, “Where—”
But he cut me off. “I’ll tell you everything, but let’s get to safety first.”
Knowing he was right, I nodded. Mel and I fell into step beside him, even though it took us far from where we needed to be.
After a few minutes, we reached the corner of the gymnasium and Carter stopped. He peered around the edge, scanning the straightaway that led to the quad. A few steps farther and we’d be in plain sight of any Collabs patrolling the quad. During the day, the quad was sanctuary. Teeming with Greens, it was the one place you’d never get caught alone by a Collab. But I’d never been out into the quad at night. I tried to step around the corner, too, but Carter planted a palm against my forehead and pushed me back, like I was pesky sibling he was nudging out of the way.
When he stepped back into the shadows, his expression was grim. He took Mel’s hand in both of his. I was shocked she didn’t pull away. “When I say the word, Mel, we’re going to walk across the path as fast as we can. Do you think you can do that?”
She tugged at her hair, cocking her head back toward the football stadium. “Red rover, red rover.”
He followed her gaze and for a second my heart leapt into my throat, thinking he might know exactly what we’d been planning to do.
“No,” he merely said. “No red rover. Jack be nimble, Jack be quick. Got it, Mel?”
The nursery rhyme trick was our own special way of communicating. I felt a stab of betrayal when Mel dropped her hand to her side and nodded. “Jack be nimble, Jack be quick.”
He stuck his head around the corner again. Apparently satisfied with whatever he saw, he said, “Okay, let’s go.”
We moved quickly across the open pathway, not toward the quad, but around the fountain toward the music hall maybe fifty feet away. The moonlight cast the landscape in a silvery glow. Our progress felt slow and endless, and by the time we reached the music hall, my heart was pounding, but I wasn’t sure why. Was it the last of the fear from Scruffy’s attack, or was it because I knew we couldn’t keep wandering around campus forever? We were getting farther and farther away from escape, but we weren’t moving in the direction of the science building, either. So where was he taking us? Could I trust him or not? My gut said yes, but the truth was, my gut was tired and underfed and not in any shape to make a decision. I desperately wanted to ask Mel what she thought. To get a second opinion. Mel was right beside me, walking so close I could feel her through my jacket even though she wasn’t touching me. Maybe the fact that she was blindly following him meant he really was the good guy I wanted him to be. Or maybe it meant she thought it was all a fun game.
Once we were back in the shadows, we slowed down, but Carter kept moving along the north side of the buildings. Carter had slung the strap of his tranq gun across his chest, so the gun crossed his back. Its inky barrel occasionally gleamed in the shadows like a water moccasin slipping through the water.
I tried to imagine how he could have gotten the gun. And the uniform. I pictured him knocking out some Collab and stealing the guy’s uniform. But this uniform fit Carter and no Collab I’d ever seen kept his boots this newly issued shiny.
It was silly, all these bizarre scenarios I’d come up with to explain where he’d gotten the Collab gear. Part of me knew the simplest explanation was the most likely. Chances were, if he looked like a Collab and acted like a Collab, then he was a Collab.
I just didn’t want him to be a Collab. I wanted him to be a guy I could trust. A partner I could rely on. Because I was friggin’ tired of being the one responsible for everything.
Every step took us farther from the possibility of freedom. Closer to the Dean’s office. I couldn’t put it off any longer. I needed answers.
I cast a sidelong glance at Mel. Her steps had slowed just as mine had. If it was just me out here with Carter, maybe I could afford to have blind faith in him. But I couldn’t risk Mel.
I grabbed Carter’s arm and pulled him to a stop. “We’re not going anywhere else until you answer some questions.”
Carter’s eyes scanned the area, like he was looking for potential danger. Or maybe just avoiding my gaze. Finally he gave a terse little nod. “Okay. But if I say the word we’ve got to keep moving again.”
I didn’t bother to point out that if I said the word, Mel and I were bailing.
“Where have you been since fourth meal? What happened to you? Why are you in a Collab uniform?”
He hitched his thumb under the strap of his tranq rifle. “It’s complicated.”
“Then simplify it.” I looked him up and down, taking in his newly shaven jaw and the crisp perfection of his uniform. “Start with why you’re dressed like a Collab.”
“Things are not what they seem. I need you to trust—”
Wrong answer.
“Come on, Mel. We’re leaving.”
“Lily, I know you’re trying to escape.”
“Well, that’s a great leap of intellect. Two girls out after curfew. However did you deduce that?”
“Damn it, Lily, we don’t have time for jokes. Just this once could you try not to be such a smart-ass?”
“Okay, fine. Just this once, why don’t you try being honest with me?”
“You want honesty?” He bit out the words. “I’m trying to save your ass here and I’d appreciate it if you didn’t make this any damn harder than it has to be.”
I threw up my hands in a WTF gesture. “Wait a second. You’re mad at me? Why are you mad?”
“Oh, come on, Lily. I thought you were the smart one. You just damn near got yourself raped and killed. If I’m mad, it’s because you’re taking reckless risks with your life.”
“Reckless? Carter, in case you haven’t noticed, this is a Farm. Our lives are at risk every single day. And those days are numbered. I don’t know exactly what’s going to happen when Mel and I turn eighteen, and I’m not going to wait around to find out, either. In my head, the risks we’re taking are anything but reckless.”
For a second he just stared at me. “But you’ve got a few months, right? Before your birthday.” Suddenly he didn’t sound angry anymore. He sounded puzzled.
“No. Our birthday is in four days.”
“What? That’s not right.”
“You think I don’t know when my birthday is?”
“Your birthday is in June.”
“Um. No.”
“When we were together in math, Mel said she was a Gemini.”
“Yeah, that’s because she’s a twin. Plus, this is Mel. She doesn’t care about astrology. Why does this matter anyway?”