Home > Fashionably Dead in Diapers (Hot Damned #4)(50)

Fashionably Dead in Diapers (Hot Damned #4)(50)
Author: Robyn Peterman

They both stared at me like I was insane. They were correct. "So," I said in a business-like tone. "Is there anything else?"

I could tell The Kev was searching for his voice. Susu simply looked stunned.

"They plan to bring the baby out at the end of the show. The Corrine believes this will force Ethan to take her as his mate," The Kev added.

"You mean Jon Bon Jovi?" I asked.

"Yes." He nodded. "But Ethan has the power to drop the disguise at any time."

"Does he know this?" I shook my head in confusion as The Kev nodded again. "Well then, why wouldn't he show his true self if The Fucking Corrine wants Jon Bon Jovi?"

The Kev hesitated for a beat. "That would be far worse. The Corrine has been obsessed with Ethan for centuries."

That made no sense whatsoever, unless…"Oh my Hell. Did he pop The Corrine?" The Kev nodded. "He wouldn't pop me but he popped The Corrine?" I screeched at the top of my tiny lungs. Susu backed away in terror.

"It was three hundred years ago and it meant nothing to him. However, The Corrine has never gotten over him," he said.

"Was he married then?" I ground out.

"No. He had no mate then. He's only recently mated."

For some reason that didn't make me feel any better. Imagining anyone touching him but me made my skin crawl—including his wife. After this was over I would never see him again. I couldn't. I wouldn't survive seeing him happy with someone else. Guilt at my immoral thoughts ate at my insides. Hopefully when my memory came back, I would realize how much I loved my husband and all thoughts of Ethan would fade away.

"Does The Corrine still believe that Samuel is Gemma's baby?" Susu asked.

"No, she doesn't," The Kev said. "But she's holding that one close to her chest. If the Fairies realize she's stolen the wrong child, her credibility will be gone and they will kill her."

"Not if I get to her first," I said as I flew to the door. "Get your strength and hurry your ass up. You're not going to want to miss this party. Susu?"

"I'm right behind you, Boss."

"I hope you’re really hungry because we're gonna off a whole bunch of Fairies."

Chapter 18

Singing lullabies to your child is a lovely bedtime ritual—unless you're tone deaf. If this holds true, we suggest downloading music and playing it to your child or hiring someone to come in and warble to your offspring at bedtime. Off pitch singing can scar a child and cost you thousands in therapy.

Making our way to the first floor of the Palace was complicated.

"Why in the Hell aren't the stairwells connected?" I asked. We had to fly down crazy zigzagging hallways to find each set of stairs. Mirrors that made us look warped and weird lined the halls and each door we passed was a different color. Fairies had shitty taste.

"It's the Grand Fun Palace," Susu explained. "This is supposed to be fun."

"Oh my Uncle God, this is so not fun," I mumbled as I passed a mirror that made me look like a fat pig with an elongated head.

"Agreed. Wait." Susu yanked me into an alcove on a floor that looked like it had suffered quite a bit of fire damage—not normal fire. Magical fire.

Six Fairies hustled down the hall in mounting states of panic. They were beautiful, but something was way off. Their skin color resembled a rainbow. I had to slap my little hand over my mouth so I didn't laugh—red, purple, yellow, blue, green and orange. WTF?

"What's wrong with them?" I whispered to Susu as they hustled by. They were muttering and a few were crying. One Fairy rubbed at her skin with a vengeance to no avail. The purple was going nowhere fast.

"I have no fucking idea," she whispered back in shock. "I have never seen anything like that. Maybe there's a disease going around."

"I certainly hope it's not contagious."

"No shit," she muttered as she checked her own skin.

I took in the damage to the walls and the rooms. It was a freakin' mess. "I thought The Corrine was a neatnik."

"She is. Something is really wrong here."

A new group of Fairies with normal skin color made their way warily down the corridor. They were headed in the direction that the diseased Fairies had just run from. None of them appeared happy. In fact, they looked terrified.

"Is this a punishment of some kind?" I asked.

"If it is, it's seriously fucked," Susu replied. "Should we check it out?"

"No. No time. We have to get to the competition. If we have time later we can come back up here."

"Sounds fair. The ballroom is only one more floor down. You ready?"

"Absofuckinglutely." I gave Susu a high five and we took off like little hummingbirds from Hell. I wasn't lying—I was so ready I could taste it.

***

"Shut the fuck up," I said to Susu. We were on a structural beam high atop the ballroom watching the festivities below. "That's really Simon Cowell, Paula Abdul and Randy Jackson?"

"In the Fairy flesh," she said and grinned.

"Do you know them?"

"Nope, I haven't been in your realm in thousands of years. Too many rules," she told me as she conjured up two bags of tiny popcorn.

"We're not really here to enjoy the show and I can't eat food. Vampyre," I reminded her as I rolled my eyes and sniffed the popcorn longingly.

   
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