“Huh, not bad. Fits them.” Caleb shrugs. “So, if you don’t want to go to school, why are you going?”
“Well, my mom comes home for lunch most days, so that might prove a little tricky. I could do the whole fake-sick-thing, but then I’d have her worrying about me and I’m too mad for that right now. There’s nowhere else to go.”
Caleb opens his mouth, then closes it again. Shakes his head, before giving me this wicked smile I’ve never seen him give to anyone, much less to me. It’s a carefree, mischievous smile and though I’m sure he does mischievous well, he doesn’t do carefree. “Wanna ditch?”
“Yeah,” I shrug trying to hide my virgin-skipping status. As if I skip all the time. “But like I said, I don’t have anywhere to go. “Plus, school is lame, but I’d be bored hanging out by myself all day anyway.”
Caleb squints is green eyes at me. “Um, no, dork. I meant do you want to skip with me?”
Gah! I’m such a noob. My heart starts malfunctioning again. Skip school? With Caleb? As in spending the whole day alone with him? Sign me up! But then the guilt starts wedging its way in to my happy little fantasy. Mom would kill me. But again…the whole day with Caleb! Maybe I misheard him. “Skip school with you?”
Caleb scratches his neck, looking over at me. “You don’t have to. It’s just an offer. I’m up for bailing on that whole scene any time I can.”
I think about Mom and how she totally ruined last night for me. About how I just want to get back at her. She won’t let me drive home alone? Well, I won’t go to school then. Of course… I don’t want her to find out about it though.
“Never mind.”
“No! I do!” I yell at him, looking like the freak show I am. “I mean, yeah. Sounds cool. Where would we go?”
“You know that little wood box you walk by every day? It’s called a house. I’m always there because it happens to be mine.”
My arm swings and I hit him with the back of my hand. “Shut up. What about your parents?”
“It won’t be a problem.” His words are tense as the ones spoken between Mom and me last night. But more than that, his eyes look sad. They close halfway and I know I shouldn’t be thinking it right now, but he’s gorgeous. All messy hair, eyes pointed downward, but such a strong face. I want to touch him. I mean, I always want to touch him, but even more so right now.
His eyes finally meet mine and I realize we’ve stopped walking. “It’s no biggie. If you don’t want to, we’ll just go to school. It’s just an offer and I don’t want to push you into something you don’t wanna do.”
This is it. My chance for the things I told Mom I want. Normal. But more than that, it’s my chance to know Caleb. And hopefully find someone to know me too. Not the girl with the vampire obsessed mom version, but the real me. “You’re not pushing me into anything. Let’s do it.”
He looks a little sick by my confirmation. Was it just a polite question? He really didn’t want to ditch with me today, but he only asked to be nice?
“You sure? I know you don’t really do this kind of thing. Would probably be smarter, anyway.”
Like always, I’m confused by his words. “I’m sure…unless you changed your mind or something. I mean, it’s cool.” Really, it’s not. Why did I think this would happen?
Caleb sighs, then rubs his temples. “Sorry, I didn’t get my sleep last night either. Not feeling so hot. If you’re game, I am too.” I nod. “Come on. Let’s get outta here.” Caleb heads toward the woods and I walk behind him, smiling.
“Last chance,” Caleb says as we walk up his porch stairs a few minutes later. He shrugs like he doesn’t care one way or another, but there’s something in his eyes that makes me feel like he’s pleading with me to say yes.
Or, it could just be a mental breakdown on my part. I can see the headlines now: Girl goes crazy when she thinks a boy might be interested in her.
“Jeez, you act like you’re trying to save my soul or something.”
His eyes close again and I know I’ve just said the worst possible thing. Which I don’t get. Is it because of his reputation? “Maybe I am.”
I roll my eyes. “Whatever.”
Caleb pushes the door open and tilts his head like he’s telling me to go in. I walk inside, stopping in the doorway, not sure where to go.
“Throw your backpack anywhere and sit down.”
I set it by the door before sitting on the couch. Caleb goes straight for the kitchen and comes back with two cokes. “I know my house isn’t much and I don’t have cable, but there are tons of movies. We can watch one if you want.”
“Sure.” I tell him to choose and he picks some loud, action movie, which I don’t pay attention to. The whole two hours I can’t stop my eyes from darting between Caleb sitting on the other side of the couch and the TV so he won’t notice I’m staring at him. His hands are bigger than mine. One rests on the couch between us. They’re veiny, a little calloused, with short nails. God, do I want to hold it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m becoming totally boy-crazed, but I can’t help it. Caleb taps his fingers on the couch, his eyes trained ahead on the movie, while I’m having a hard time even focusing on breathing.
Before I know it, the credits are rolling. “Good?” he asks.
“Yeah! I loved it!”
Caleb laughs. “You’re a pretty good actress.”
I laugh too. “Whatever. I enjoyed myself.” Watching you…
A shiver slides over me. “Are you cold?” he asks, and I am. It was cloudy this morning and his cabin feels colder than it did outside.
“Yeah. I’m always cold.”
“I’ll make a fire. Be right back.”
Not wanting him to leave, I say, “You don’t have to go through all that trouble. Maybe just turn on the heater for a few minutes to take the edge off, and I’ll be fine.”
Caleb pushes off the touch anyway. “Don’t have heat.”
My cheeks burn for a different reason this time. I can’t even keep tally marks on how many dumb things I’ve said today. “Sorry.”
Caleb heads out, and comes back in a few minutes later with his arms full of wood. My eyes don’t leave him while he starts the fire.
“Are you hungry?”
Now I know there are those girls out there who don’t eat in front of a boy. I’ve never really had it come up, but my stomach growling proves to me I’m not one of those girls. “Yeah.”
Caleb walks in the kitchen and opens a small fridge. I try and peek around him to look inside, but I can’t.
“Okay so we have sandwiches. Or…lunchmeat and cheese…”
“So basically sandwiches?”
He tosses a glance over his shoulder and it’s another one of those carefree, mischievous looks. “Basically.”
“Sounds good to me.” I offer to help, but Caleb only grunts a no, so I sit at the same table I sat at when he cleaned my wound. So crazy. I still can’t believe Caleb Evans played nurse for me. It’s enough to make a girl swoon.
We don’t talk much while we eat: Caleb just because he’s quiet and me because I’m afraid I have food in my teeth. When we’re done, I take both our plates and rinse them off, before putting them in the dish rack. Then, there’s that silence that always warns of an idiot-Abby moment. I don’t know what to say and either he feels the same or he just doesn’t feel like talking, but I’m starting to feel nervous, the whole reality of this day reviving itself inside me.
I feel that familiar pitter-patter of my heart, which excites the butterflies and before you know it, I’m psycho again. “So…” Don’t say anything stupid… Don’t say anything stupid… Figuring my legs could use a stretch from the whole ten minutes we sat at the table, I start circling his small living room. “No pictures?”
“Huh?” He looks at me like I’m an alien with two heads.
“Pictures. You guys don’t like to take family pictures? Mom is crazy about them. She takes photos of every occasion. I swear there isn’t a corner of my house that doesn’t have some kind of lame picture of me.” I should have shut up like two sentences ago. My face heats.
“You blush a lot.” Totally ignored my question, but I don’t call him on it. Instead my body heat goes up more. “Why are you embarrassed now? All I said is you blush a lot and you look like you’re going to explode over there, Kitten.” Caleb stands. “You don’t have to be shy around me. I’m nothing special.”
To me he is something special. He took care of The LP when I needed him, offered to walk me to and from school, and when no one else wants to be caught dead with me, he invites me here. But I can’t say that. “I don’t know why I’m like perma-red around you. I guess it’s because I’ve never had a boyfriend before.” As soon as the words slip from my mouth, I want run. Run from his cabin and sew my annoying, flapping lips closed so I never say something stupid again. “I did not mean boyfriend, boyfriend. I meant, boy that’s a friend. You know. Boy—friend. Like, you know, a guy I hang-out with.” Shut up!
Caleb opens his mouth and I’m ready to get kicked out of his cabin and asked not to come back. Freak show, remember? See, I don’t even need vampires to make me crazy. But he doesn’t kick me out, instead a loud, boisterous laugher rolls out. Honestly I never would have thought he could laugh so hard and part of me wants to sit back and enjoy the sound, but the logical part of me knows he’s laughing at me which makes it not-so-cute anymore. “I’m glad you think I’m funny.”
“I’m not laughing at you.”
“Could have fooled me.” I pout and right now, I’m not even embarrassed about it.